How To Be Good In Bed

How To Be Good In BedHere in the Green Shopper household, I’ve worked hard to make my bedroom plastic-free and ethical. We are phasing out synthetic fibres in our bedding and have replaced our mattress with a natural latex and organic cotton version. I’ve covered all this in my previous post The Plastic Free Bedroom. So… this post is gonna cover the juicy stuff. Suitable for couples AND singles.

If you’re easily embarrased, a bit prudish, or a member of my family: please stop reading here. Or be prepared to blush. *All affiliate links in the article are marked with an asterisk*

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Do you ‘make love’ or do you fuck? Maybe you bang, bone, bonk or screw? Perhaps you wank. Or shag. Or just watch ‘Netflix and chill’ 😉  Whatever you call it, if you’re feeling saucy and you care about the planet, then I’ve got some seriously good tips on sourcing ethical lingerie, sex toys, contraceptives and porn. Oh, and pyjamas.

Let’s start with something to wear…

Ethical lingerie

Finding smalls that are beautiful and ethical is pretty tricky – I’ve spent years hunting for the best options and am now happy to report that I’ve got a pretty good dressing-up box.

  • Know The Origin* are an amazing brand with good supply chain transparency. Their gorgeous Amy bra* and briefs* by Underprotection are made from 100% recycled nylon and polyester. Mi Apparel also stock a range of Underprotection lingerie and loungewear
  • Colie Co use sustainable materials such as organic cotton jersey, bamboo and deadstock fabric to create some saucy and playful designs. They are ethically made in a small studio in Portugal
  • The Little Black Pants Club make ‘comfy organic underwear for self identifying women who are woke AF’ using sustainable materials in their Brixton workshop
  • Lara Intimates specialise in non-wired bras made from resposibly sourced deadstock fabric in an inclusive size range. They are designed and made in London by an all-female team
  • Ayton Gasson specialise in luxury silk lingerie and are made in Brighton. They have a small ethical range using sustainable materials such as peace silk and organic bamboo jersey
  • Buttress & Snatch have a quirky range of Great British Underwear and Lovely Lingerie Handmade in Hackney’. Think saucy mermaids and 1950s pin-ups

  • Although the glovemaker Cornelia James doesn’t have any information about their sustainability policy online, their products are made in Sussex to a very high standard, and they offer lifelong repairs. I’ve got a pair of their Sophie Lace Mittens and absolutely love them
  • Luva Huva are a small brand based in Brighton, who make luxury lingerie with silks and fabric remnants. They are currently closed for maternity leave but do follow them on Instagram for updates.
  • If you’ve got a kink for high heels, it’s worth scouting for some second-hand ones in the charity shops or online at Preloved* or Oxfam Online*. Lots of people buy heels that are too high, wear them once or twice and then pass them on.

Contraceptives

We are lucky to live in an a time where there is a choice of contraceptive options. During the last 25 years I have tried most of them: Condoms, the pill, the coil, the cap, the honey cap (yes, that’s a thing) and the Natural Fertility Awareness (NFA) technique.

Some women feel totally fine using the pill. If it works for you, great! I’m not here to tell anyone what they should or shouldn’t do. However, please consider recycling your pill packaging through The Medicine Packet Recycling Programme with Terracycle: you can find your nearest drop-off location on this map. Many women react badly to hormonal contraceptives. Known ‘side-effects’ range from mood swings, nausea, headaches, through to deep vein thrombosis, pulmonary embolus, strokes, heart attacks and an increased risk of breast cancer. The synthetic hormones might even leach into the environment and cause ‘feminisation’ of male fish. The pill worked fairly well as a contraceptive for me by making me so grumpy and irritable that sex was out of the question.

Chemical spermicides and lubricants on most condoms can cause irritation in our most intimate areas, leading to repeated infections such as thrush and bacterial vaginosis. If you’ve had a bad experience with coated condoms, do try Fair Squared condoms* as a natural alternative. The Sensitive version hasn’t got any coatings or additives – it’s just 100% natural latex.

The most ‘zero-waste’ option for contraception is definitely Natural Fertility Awareness. This option is only suitable if you have a regular menstrual cycle, regular daily routine and a reliable partner. NFA isn’t just ‘the rhythm method’ – it relies on the triple check technique, with daily monitoring of Basal Body Temperature, cervical mucus and cyclical changes to the cervix. It takes a lot of commitment and care – please make sure to learn from a qualified teacher. Contact the NFPTA to find out more.

This is not a contraceptive – but if you enjoy sex during your period and want to skip the mess, did you know that some styles of menstrual cup are designed with this in mind?! Check out the Ziggy cup from Intimina* from Planet Organic.


Lubricants

If you haven’t got a WAP** and need some lubricant, try Yes* – they have a range that includes water based lube which is suitable for use with condoms and sex toys, oil based lube, and Yes But* which is specially formulated for anal play.
I’ve heard good things about a CBD infused lubricant from CBDBristol called Yoni Love. “Yoni Love is a rich CBD infused oil-based lubricant designed to increase sensation, blood flow, sensual healing and orgasmic potential… made with 95% Broad spectrum CBD Distillate and with a whooping 300mg per bottle it’s a perfect gift for self-pleasure or play with a partner”. It is oil-based so can’t be used with condoms.


Toys

If you’re looking for naughty toys, check out some of these glass and ceramic dildos, wooden butt plugs and rechargeable vibrators.
  • Higher Desire have a range of hand turned wooden dildos and butt plugs as well as some glass options
  • Fine Bone make beautiful porcelain ‘pleasure tools’
  • Jo Divine specialise in silicone, glass and metal toys and also have a great blog with lots of info
  • Pleasure Drum is a body positive company owned by a black female entrepreneur. Their rechargable silicone vibrators come with gorgeous West African fabric storage bags.
  • Smile Makers* vibrators are silent, made from high quality silicone, and come in a range of shapes so you can find one to suit your vulva.

If your sex toy is broken or no longer wanted, please remember to dispose of it responsibly. Lovehoney have a free electrical sex toy recycling scheme:“If you wish, you can send your unwanted electrical sex toys to us for recycling, even if you didn’t purchase them from us. Items sent to Lovehoney are taken to a designated collection facility where they are recycled and treated in an ecologically sound manner.”
Send your items to: Lovehoney Recycling, 100 Locksbrook Road, Bath, BA1 3EN

If you want some hilarious ‘upcycling’ ideas and fancy a giggle, check out this little clip from The B@it on Channel 4.

Something to watch?

Perhaps you’ve watched retro NYC drama The Deuce and have been inspired by Maggie Gyllenhaal’s amazing hooker-turned-director Eileen to seek out some female-made-and-produced porn? Yes? You probably need to meet independent adult filmmaker Erika Lust and director Vex Ashley.
 

Have fun! 😉

And when it’s time to get some sleep, why not check out some of these super pyjamas from The Bright Company, Noctu, Kite Clothing*, Polarn O Pyret*, or the range at Natural Collection*

*Affiliate links are marked with an asterisk
**Don’t know what I’m on about? Listen to Cardi B – WAP feat. Megan Thee Stallion

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